The Songs We’ll Be Singing at Weddings in 2040

  • Shallow (no one will mention it’s about self-harm)
  • Mo Bamba (please—and I can’t stress this enough—distribute cards reminding white relatives that it’s not appropriate to sing all the words)
  • Lover (in so far as one sings along to a first dance)
  • No Diggity (we still won’t have developed the technology to dance to it well though 😭)
  • Summer of ’69 (Ryan Adams is CANCELED)
  • I Gotta Feeling (as required by federal law)

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