Category: News

Ranking The Damn Monoliths

~ leftonreadletter ~ Leave a comment

If there is one thing we know about the monoliths that have begun popping up worldwide, it’s this: they say a lot about society. 

If there are TWO things we know about the monoliths that have begun popping up worldwide, it’s this: happy monoliths are all alike; every unhappy monolith is unhappy in its own way. 

But if there are THREE things we know about the monoliths that have begun popping up nationwide, it’s this: I’m gonna rank em. 

7. The New Mexico Monolith. This monolith bored me. 

6. The Second California Monolith. I fucking hate this piece of garbage. A boring, clearly copycat influencer-bait piece of shit. It wasn’t even the first monolith in its county! 

5. The Romanian Monolith. Garbage-ass IKEA bullshit. It’s not even a monolith, it very CLEARLY has different sections that were INEXPERTLY welded together. Piss off, you fucking poser. 

4. The First California Monolith. I honestly don’t know why San Luis Obispo thought it got to be part of this. Plus some artists or something have already taken credit, which is not how this is supposed to work.

3. The Netherlands Monolith. This monolith is fine. Underreported imo, and potentially not even real, which is a big plus honestly.

2. The Utah Monolith. The original was honestly kinda cool. Apparently it had been there for years, and it was far enough out of the way that it didn’t seem like a tourist trap. Plus no one really knows what or where Utah is, so it had an air of mystery. And it was tight when it disappeared, at least until the other ones started showing up. 

1. The Isle of Wight Monolith. Shiny. On an unnecessarily pretentious-sounding British island. Photogenic setting. Quality build. Checks all the boxes. 🤩🤩🤩

So apparently there’s some scary new virus and no one will tell me if it’ll make me skinny

~ leftonreadletter ~ Leave a comment

If you’ve been able to pry your eyes away from the Senate’s unconstitutional witchhunt, you’ve probably heard that there’s some new coronavirus going around and we’re all supposed to be terrified about it.

But while the corporate media is busy whipping us all up into a frenzy, there are so many questions I still can’t find answers to. Like, what are the symptoms of this supposed virus? Do they include sudden and dramatic weight loss? How long would something like that even take? Would it happen in time for a wedding later this month?

I think it goes without saying, the lamestream media is more interested in clicks and ratings than in giving us the real information. And I’m not alleging any sort of cover-up, but the CDC so far won’t comment on even my most basic requests for information. Simple questions like “if the symptoms do include massive weight loss, how would one go about contracting this virus?” are going unanswered each day.

It’s time for the people to know the truth. We’re sick of the lies, distractions, and false narratives. Someone needs to tell me if this virus will make me skinny, and they need to tell me now.