Uh oh, the guys from Platteville are here and they’re looking to start a rock fight

Well chumps, we can’t just stand around here all day—we gotta do something! Here’s who we should round up to try and put up a fight: 

  • Billy. He’s old for his year and has had a hair-trigger temper ever since his dad moved to the big city with his new girlfriend Trish
  • Smelly Ted
  • Janice. She once hit me in the eye with an iceball so hard it gave me an orbital fracture. And she vapes, which is edgy
  • Former Philadelphia Phillies Starting LHP Cliff Lee
  • Caden 
  • Braden
  • Jaden
  • Almost Famous–era Billy Crudup
  • Brayden